Wednesday, October 1, 2008


Jon figured it was work. The frown on her face said it all. "Work needs you?" His hands fisted as he jammed them into his pockets.

She clutched her cell phone to her chest "Yes" she groaned. God why now? Why now when I actually was beginning to feel something for him? "One of my biggest accounts, Daniel Delmont is threatening to move all his business to our biggest competitor unless I show up in his office tomorrow to sort this mess out." She leaned back into the wall and closed her eyes silently cursing.

Jon clenched his fists, trying not to show his disappointment "You really have to go? No one else can do it for you?" Fuck he sounded pathetic but right now he shoved his pride away. He didn't want her to go. Not now, not when they'd almost… but it wasn't just about that. He looked down and shuffled his feet. He was falling for her. Damn it.

She chuckled placing her phone down "I should be able to let it go, and tell him that Miranda can handle it, but…" she bit on the end of her thumb.

Jon laughed "You have to do it yourself to make sure it's done the way you want?" he asked. God she was so much like him when it came to business.

She stood in the middle of the room letting her arms fall to her side. "I'm so sorry, I'm getting a flight out this morning." Never in her life had she not wanted to go back to work. That was always her life, her livelihood and something she believed in. For the first time ever she wanted to blow it off. Desperately.

Jon came closer and took her hands in his, bringing them to his lips "It’s ok, believe it or not I understand. I'm not ashamed to admit that I don't want you to go though Lily. And it's not just because…" he trailed off as she reached up to his cheek.

"I know, me too." She took the first move this time and leaned in for a long kiss, her tongue teasing his upper lip before snaking into his mouth. His arms folded her in an embrace with the force of his own kiss growing stronger.

"Then don't go," he whispered against her lips, "stay, here with me." He trailed hot wet kisses against her neck receiving a giggle for the effort. She was fucking crazy to say no. But this was new, exciting. This wasn't the Lily she had known for so long the Lily that didn't let people in, why had she gone and done that? It would only end in heartbreak, she knew that better than most.

His grip around her tightened as he gently pushed her back against the wall, his hands moving to cup her face before she could object. She was still going to go, he knew she would but he had to at least try.

"Please stay." The pad of his thumb drew a lazy circle on her cheek.

Her knees were shaking again, why did he do this to her? She became like jelly in his arms so easily. "Jon… I want you…" she closed her eyes "God I want to," she whispered. Breathing in his rich scent again, she hoped to never forget that mix of spring and spice. She put her hands gently on his chest and pushed him back just an inch.

Intense Sapphire eyes threatened to take the very heart of her right there. "I can't."

Jon's lips curved at the side into a small smile "Worth a try though wasn't it?' he teased.

She laughed still in his embrace "You have no idea Jon, I don't usually…" she again stopped scared to say the words but his finger found her lips.

"You don't have to say Lily, I know and I feel the same way ok?" He pulled back finally releasing her, albeit reluctantly from his grip. "Can I at least make you coffee and breakfast while you get ready?" he asked hopefully.

She nodded "I'd really like that, I'll go and pack and get organized, just help yourself in there. The housekeeper will be cleaning up once I've gone so don't worry too much about that," she instructed.

Jon watched her pad her way to the bathroom and let a small moan slip. His eyes fixated on the way her hips swayed when she walked. Was this bad luck? Or was it just the wrong place, wrong time for this? They'd finally just connected in a mutual way putting everything else aside. He hadn't felt this way since he met his wife, hell even this was different in a way. Lily was so self assured and strong yet still so innocent in a way that was so alluring and sexy.

He prepared the toasted muesli, fresh fruit and yogurt for them both and poured two cups of coffee before carrying them out to her deck. The morning was still young, the sun just peeking above the water’s edge reaching into the day. Walking back inside he gathered up her things into a pile that he figured she'd need to take with her when something caught his eye on the table.

He picked up the small pale green business card with silver writing and grinned that it had displayed her name and St James Advertising's numbers and address in Notting Hill, London. He slipped it into the back pocket of his jeans safely. He might let her go now, but he didn't have much business to deal with over the next few weeks so a trip to London just might be on the cards.

Lily showered and redressed quickly, packing everything up in her suitcase before tying her hair up in a loose ponytail and slipping her sunglasses on. Applying some lip gloss she did a once over of the room, ordered a cab. Grabbing her bags she headed back to the living room. Dumping them on the floor she walked out to the deck where Jon was sitting crossed legged enjoying the view.

"Wow I should get you to make breakfast more often" she said sliding into the wooden chair opposite him popping a strawberry in her mouth.

"All part of the morning after service," he teased pouring her a coffee out of the pot.

Lily felt the warmth hit her cheeks. "Well we never really got that far, I'm so sorry I've never fallen asleep on anyone before" she admitted reaching for her spoon and scooping up some muesli.

Jon snorted "And you think I have?"

Lily laughed "I have to say the meal and wine was delicious Jon and thank you for a lovely and well… amusing time this week," she winked remembering his plumbing antics.

"Hey now. I hope you realize that I'll never live that down with my band mates don't you?" he asked digging into his own bowl.

She was sitting there in plain white linen dress and sandals, casual but classy, showing off again those fantastically tanned legs that he almost got to know inside out.

Lily just about choked on her coffee "I'm sorry. Next time how about a simple I'm not sure how to do this but use my shower until your plumber gets there?" curling her lips into a smile she shook her head. Although I did get to see you in a towel.

Jon laughed "I know I admit it, I just wanted an excuse to see you... Its lame I know, but it worked," he admitted holding his hands up.

She twisted her lips into a pout "And again, how about a Lily, I'd like to take you to dinner? It does still work once and a while," she winked.

"And you really would have said yes after the night before incident when you misheard my conversation, sure... you would have said yes?" He rolled his eyes heavenward and then smiled, his blue eyes sparkling.

"Ok ok, it seems that none of us were good at this whole asking people out thing." She swept back loose strands from her face with her hand. She looked down at her watch "Oh god, my cab is going to be here any minute. I have to get there early, now with all the extra security it seems to take forever," she said springing up from her chair carrying her coffee back into the living area.

Jon put down his napkin and followed her "The world has certainly changed over last year hasn't it?" he asked.

She jammed her keys and everything into her leather tote. "It was awful Jon, just awful. Almost makes you never want to fly again, but you know, that's what the bastards want right?" she asked flinging her bag over her shoulder. God she didn't want to go, she wanted to ask if she could call him or something but she was so bad at this.

"You are exactly right Lily St James….are you sure you don't have to go?" he asked reaching out for her arms and drawing her in close, taking her coffee and putting it back on the table.

She chuckled "We've been over this, I want to. You know I do" she tugged at the collar of his shirt. Say it, just ask him damn it.

"Was worth another try" he teased brushing his lips over hers one final time.

She held him back it was now or never "Jon, I really want to say something" she said looking straight into expectant eyes. He nodded so she continued. Again the ridiculous trembles of her arms had started, but she'd kick herself for not saying it.

"I want to thank you, for this, everything… but most of all," she looked down breaking his gaze but it was his hand under her chin that made her connect with him again. "This sounds stupid but, thank you for making me feel normal again" she said finally feeling the breath in her lungs leave.

"Believe it or not I know exactly what you mean, and I hope you don't think I'm being too forward but somehow, someday. I really want to see you again." Their living situations could prove that difficult but he had to know if there was some hope in him pursuing an overseas trip in the very near future.

Nodding gently she felt relief settle through her "I'd really like that Jon," she said simply.

"I'll find you," was all he said before he kissed her once more, the smell of coconuts and mangoes washing over him one more time, the smell he'd always remember her by if nothing else. The sharp honk of a horn interrupted them.

"Be safe" he whispered leaning in, kissing her on the nose and then the forehead. Lily was thankful she still had sunglasses on when the small pricks of tears threatened. She couldn't believe it or understand her reluctance to let go of him but she had to. She collected her bags and with one final "Goodbye Jon," she was gone.

Jon pulled the door shut to the St James house and walked home with more just a small smile on his face. He fished in his back pocket for her business card and reading it again his grin broadened, standing looking out to the beach he thought of the woman that was Lily St James.

I will come for you at nighttime
I will raise you from your sleep
I will kiss you in four places
As I go running along your street
I will squeeze the life out of you

You will make me laugh and make me cry
And we will never forget it
You will make me call your name
And I'll shout it to the blue summer sky
And we may never meet again
So shed your skin and let's get started

And you will throw your arms around me
Yeah, you will throw your arms around me
I dreamed of you at nighttime
And I watched you in your sleep

I met you in high places
I touched your head and touched your feet
So if you disappear out of view
You know I will never say goodbye
And though I try to forget it
You will make me call your name
And I'll shout it to the blue summer sky...

And we may never meet again...
So shed your skin and let's get started
And you will throw your arms around me
Yeah, you will throw your arms around meOh...yeah...

Ohhh yeah...
You will throw your arms around me...
Yeah, you will throw your arms around me....

The End.


The short walk to the bedroom was a blur, before she felt the soft bed covers against her skin. Jon crawled on the bed behind her, his lips following every inch of her body. She twined her arms around his neck and drew him in with a deep kiss. Each time she closed her eyes enjoying the scent and the feeling of him, she struggled to open them. The fog in her head was growing thick and she was desperately fighting it to stay in the land of consciousness.

Jon kissed up the arch of her neck, her whole body lifting off the white cotton bed sheets into his body, there was no refusal from her this time. Three bottles of Savvy back at the restaurant was starting to play havoc with his own vision and the goddess below him started to slowly fade. He quickly stamped down any signs of his body giving into to the sedation that the wine was offering. Lily, in such a short time she’d already become important to him and that didn’t happen. Hell it never happened.

His fingers dusted around the back of her neck making light work of the tie of her halter neck. Slowly he peeled back the material placing kisses along each inch of skin he revealed. Resting his chin at the top of her chest he looked up to meet hooded eyes. Dragging his pinkie over the soft curve of her breast now barely covered with the dress. Her skin was amazingly soft, like rose petals and nothing like he’d even felt before. Jon could feel her heartbeat against his kisses along with the rapid rise and fall of her chest.

“Jon…” she managed, her fingers twining through the blond tendrils of his hair. Her skin goosed with the darkness now in his eyes. She was screaming from the inside out for his touch.

“What do you want?” his voice was low and husky. What did she want? Fuck, she’d never been asked that in this situation before. Biting down on her lip her hand nudged him closer to her breast, her nipples already were tight and ached for his tongue.

Grinning he hooked his index finger under the remaining material and peeled the material down a little further to reveal her whole breast. His tongue flashed out but barely touched her rosy pink tip.

She growled and bucked upwards “Not fair”.

Bringing his other hand over her other breast he stripped the midnight blue cup of her halter away “Life isn’t fair, you know that Lily”.

She gasped when his warm breath teased over her skin but still no contact came. “You are such a shit”.

“Close your eyes…” his voice came with a demanding but soft tone.

She leaned back into the pillows and did what he asked. Closing her eyes she tried to relax under the anticipation of waiting for his touch. She was surprised how easy her mind switched off, and as much as she tried to fight to stay conscious she felt herself slipping away.


It wasn’t until what seemed like only moments later the shrill sound of her cell phone could be heard from the living room still buried in her purse. She groaned and went to roll over but the heaviness of her chest caused her to open her eyes. She winced and when the bright sun hit, good god how much did I drink last night?

Bringing her hand to rub her eyes she slowly adjusted to the light in the room, her eyes feel to her chest where one man was fast asleep, his lips a few inches from her naked breast. Oh my god, Oh my god.

The night came rushing back thick and fast along with her arousal. She’d fell asleep? Holy shit! She managed a small laugh; her dress wasn’t even half off her. Oh god, only she could fall asleep when she actually had the opportunity for sex. Shit.

“Jon…” she whispered. Her cell phone was still ringing and she needed to get it.

Jon grumbled at the high pitched chirping, stupid alarm clock, fuck! Slowly he opened his eyes, promptly slamming them shut again at the glaring sun in the room. Lily! Oh fuck, the image of blue silk and skin came slowly floating back into view when his eyes adjusted. Meeting her sleepy blue eyes relieved to see there was no embarrassment there, thank god.

“I need to get up and get my phone” she said softly tousling his hair with her hand.

He started to chuckle. When was the last time he passed out on wine? When he was twenty something? And it had to be last night of all fucking nights. Jesus Christ Bongiovi.

He went to move off her, and the shrilling stopped. “See no need now” he sat up and scratched his chin and started laughing.

Lily snorted “Stop it, I can’t remember who passed out first, was it you or me?” she asked pulling her dress back up. Oddly enough this didn’t feel like one of those uncomfortable morning-after moments.

“I have no idea, I just remember what I was going to do to you…” he reached out and tucked a strand of her hair behind her face. “And I still do” he said with a small smirk.

She lay back with Jon hovering back over her, her hands sweeping through his hair. “For the record so do I” her thumb brushed the rigid line of his jaw.

The loud bleep of the bedside phone interrupted them again, she groaned and reached out for it but Jon grabbed her wrist “Ignore it” he commanded, his lips desperate to take the journey of last night again.

She let it go and it rang till whoever was on the other end gave up, it more than likely was probably her father. She found herself tugging at the buttons of his shirt under eyes that had no intention to let her move until such time she was satisfied. She splayed her fingers through the fine hair that was splattered there. God it was so soft and so inviting just as she had imagined.

He moaned as her hands slid over his skin, hissing when her thumbs flicked over his nipples. Fuck what she was doing to him, his cock waking up again still hard from last night and needing to be inside her.

The intrusion once more of the loud piercing of her cell phone came again. Lily knew it had to be important if they weren’t satisfied leaving a message, god not now, anything but now.

She pulled Jon up “Honey, I need to get it” she just called him honey? She chuckled when he groaned and rolled off her.

“I’ll get rid of them, I promise” she pulled up from the bed and tied her dress up before heading for her purse on the living room floor. Fishing for her cell phone she flipped it open.

“Lily speaking” It was her London office.

“Hey beach girl” the high nervous British accent of her second in charge Miranda came on the line. The usually high nervous pitch of her voice that meant she was trying to keep calm but something was dreadfully wrong.

Lily brought her hand to her head “Cut the crap Miranda, what’s happened?” she asked regretting the question. God why I didn’t fire this woman?

“It’s the Delmont account, Mr Delmont isn’t happy and he’s asking for you personally” she stuttered. Lily pictured her sitting in her office twisting a pencil though her long red hair nervously.

“Why? We drafted that entire portfolio to the demands of his people before I left?” she asked not even seeing Jon come out of the bedroom.

“Well it seems that his people got it wrong, I know you’re on holiday but you know how big his account is... and he wants you” she said.

Lily sighed “Well get him to call me”. She smiled at Jon apologetically.

There was a pause and then Miranda spoke “He’s asking for you in person or he’s threatening to pull the account with us and go over to Saatchi and Saatchi’s”.

“Shit” she muttered. Anything but that, she’d put too much work into the Delmont account to let it just go now.

“And let me guess he wants me today” she groaned. For the first time in her life she didn’t want to leave. Jon had moved to the window and was staring out to the ocean, his shirt was hanging out and his hair was still all mussed from the bed. She felt her ovaries twinge at leaving him behind.

“Well, yes. I took the liberty and checked and there’s a flight out at noon, you could make that and be back for the morning” Miranda suggested.

She rubbed her forehead and closed her eyes “God, Miranda, ok book it I will get there just email me the details” she said before slamming the phone shut. She turned to Jon “I don’t believe this” she said shaking her head.


The dinner arrived and the wine flowed freely. By the third bottle of wine between them Lily had moved and was sitting beside him on her chair. She sat with her legs crossed and the glass of wine resting on her knee. The scent of him constantly was a reminder of his body pressed against hers just moments ago in the dance they had just shared. The tension still hung heavy over them but with in it all they still managed to relax and enjoy each other’s company. Jon had been telling Lily about the things the band used to get up to in the younger days, and admitting things he probably shouldn’t be.

She brought the glass to her lips “I don’t know how you boys are still alive” she shook her head and laughed. “You used to share girls?” she asked again at the revelation he’d given her. What a cliché. He really had lived the rock star lifestyle. Why is this a turn on?

He leaned back flattening his hands down on his thighs “Not my proudest days but I was so young and stupid back then, didn’t have a clue…” he smiled. The way her eyes remained attentively on his was killing him. He stared once too often getting washed away in the ocean blue of her soul.

“Well we were all young once” she laughed fading out memories of her own youth. They were nothing compared to what Jon had been through, a few drunken one night stands at college but really nothing to chalk up to the well bedded rock star.

Maybe it was the wine that was talking but her curiosity got the better of her “So what changed you and made you decide to get married?” her fingers flexed further around the stem of the glass.

Jon chuckled, “Well I was in love and again I was young and thought she was the one… and well you know how it goes…life gets in the way and you lose focus on what’s important and then its too late to fix it…” he ran his hand through his hair “I don’t know Lily…it was a combination of things but in the end we just weren’t in love with each other and now I’m trying to learn to live alone again” he admitted. He hated showing people his weaknesses but in front of her it seemed just natural to be able to admit anything. Something he’d missed in a long time.

Lily listened and nodded, she could see parts of herself in Jon but the difference was she never allowed herself to go down that path and get married. She’d chosen to stay alone, depend on just herself and her career to carry her along. Things that were in her control no one else’s.

“You’re doing better than you think” she said honestly. The buzzing in her brain that was wine induced prompted her to lean forward and place her hand on his knee.

Jon reached up and brushed his thumb across her cheek, her diluted blue eyes shone right back at him. “How about you? I still can’t believe that a gorgeous woman like you hasn’t had suitors knocking down her door every five minutes?”

She snorted softly “There has been suitors, I’ve just never opened the door Jon…” she trailed off. Like a moth drawn to a flame she found herself drifting forward towards his lips with an indescribable need to feel them on hers. She was surprised when he stopped midway and pulled back a subtle smirk twitching at the corners of his mouth.

“What about now? Going to open the door?” he whispered his hot breath tickling across her face.

God, she wanted to. No man in the short space she’d known him had made her feel like this, parts of her body ached for him that hadn’t since forever. Her hand that was free reached up and brushed his cheek “Jon…I want to” she managed. But I’m not sure I remember how. The room was rocking induced by the amount of alcohol she’d consumed but she was past caring. She wanted him and she wanted him now.

With their eyes deadlocked he inched in closer, his lips only seconds away from hers. Expecting his kiss she gasped and then groaned when he diverted to the long arch of her neck. Feather light brushes stroked down her neck pushing her back into the leather back chair she was seated in.

The taste of her skin was sweeter than he expected causing his pants to become uncomfortably tight. One taste of her wasn’t going to be enough, he had to get her out of here and now. He pulled back up to her lips she again leaned into him but denying her the kiss he stood up “Let’s leave”

His eyes were dark and heated and filled with the promise of what was to come. She lifted herself by his strength and followed him to the door, her hand laced in his. Her heart threatened to jump out her throat as they made there way out into the cool summer night. The crisp sea air whipped around their bodies with his dinner jacket flapping in the breeze.

He held her facing him, both hands latched on her waist, his own head was beginning to spin. He was used to drinking copious amounts of wine but even now his own vision was a little blurred apart from the gorgeous woman standing in front of him

His body was craving the kiss as much as she was but he was still intent to make her wait just a little longer. His nose nuzzled against hers before he broke his grasp and led her towards the waiting car for the drive back home.

She shimmied across the backseat with him not far behind her, he signalled the driver and they were off. He reached over and smiled pulling her in close, their thighs rubbing together on the leather seats. The heavy scent of coconuts and mangoes once again in his reach.

“My place?” he asked dragging his lips across her cheek to her ear letting his tongue tease the lobe.

She let a small groan slip winding her arms around his neck letting him freefall over her. “Mine” she whispered. She needed to be somewhere familiar if she was going to do this. Her mind had shut off an hour ago and all doubts she had drifted away while she melted like butter in his arms.

Her breath hitched feeling his lips followed by teeth scrape across the prominent bone in her shoulder. She turned her head and kissed the side of his temple before delving lower down that rigid cheekbone until he relented and faced her. Her lips crashed down on his, she couldn’t hold it back no longer her hand grabbing his chin and turning it towards her “Please kiss me”.

The lust was evident in her eyes turning them a dark shade of blue.

“I thought you’d never ask” both of his hands found the back of her head pulling her to him giving him the leverage he needed to be further inside her.

Her breasts pressed into his chest, and for the love of god if they weren’t in a back seat of a car she would have had him undress her. His hot hungry mouth left hers, travelling back down her neck and this time down the valley of her breasts. His hand was slid up her thigh with the thin material bunching underneath his palm.

She cried out when his mouth met nipple through the material of her dress. Dizzy with lust and buzzing with the wine she launched herself at him pushing him back against the chair. Hers hands ran all the way down her shirt stopping momentarily at his belt. God, what was she doing? If she could see herself now, she had lost all self control.

His hand grabbed hers before she could move it further over what she could only imagine was rock hardness. “Not here Lily… I need you where I don’t have to stop midway because once I get started, I’m not going to stop” his voice was almost a growl with a promise on it.

She shivered against him, her every being vibrated at the thoughts of what was evidently going to happen once they got out of the car and into her house. She nibbled at the edge of his chin before dipping her tongue into the crease. Her inner thighs were growing slick to her embarrassment. “Ok” she whispered. He traced her cheekbone with his index finger before resting it at her lips. She licked the tip of his finger wrapping her lips around the rest sucking lightly.

Fuck she’s going to kill me before we even get there. The tease inside him matched hers slowly thrusting his finger in and out of her mouth both knowing exactly what they were mimicking. He closed his eyes and groaned, his cock jerking in anticipation for that sweet mouth and her full lips to be around him now.

Thankfully the car came to a halt and they were outside Lily’s home. Jon quickly pulled a wad of bills not bothering to count them and handed them to the driver, his eyes never leaving hers. Giggling and stumbling they made their way to front door where she managed to fish her keys from her purse and unlock the door with Jon plastered to her from behind nibbling on every bit of skin he could reach. Once inside he kicked the door closed and stalked towards her, she took a cautionary step backwards each time he did. The eyes told it all, both burning bright with desire. There was a clunk and a thud, her keys and purse dropped to the ground before he grabbed her and held her against the wall.

He tasted like rich wine and chilli, and was coming at her like animal stalking its prey. This time she wanted to be hunted, and most of all she wanted to be devoured by him. She moaned into his kiss feeling the bump of his erection pressing against her belly.

“I need….I want…” she stumbled on the words as they fell out of her mouth between his intentions. She squealed when he lifted her into his arms and began to walk towards the bedroom, This was it…finally…


Taking Lily's hand and Jon led her out to the deserted courtyard where just the click of her heels could be heard over the music. The twinkle of the fairy lights above them and the fading summer scent of jasmine set the mood accompanied by the slow melodic music.

She felt her stomach do a small flip flop when the tips of his fingers brushed against the small of her back teasing her spine. He edged her in close to him beginning to sway them in time to the slow beat of the music. She swallowed hard and met dark blue eyes that would easily undress her if they tried but they never left her face.

I don't wanna hurt nobody
Don't wanna make nobody cry
I don't wanna do wrong, I don't wanna do wrong
I don't wanna tell no lies
Girl, I'm lovin' you, lovin' you against my will
Lovin' you, lovin' you against my will

She closed her eyes, the music beginning to take over the moment. Ironically the words explained just how she felt right at that moment. Her body trembled in his arms threatening to give way, give in to need to be close to him. She moved one hand to his shoulder and the other in his hand and he squeezed it tightly rocking her in time with the beat.

One part of her wanted to relent, throw her arms around him and let it go and the other wanted to pull away and draw the wall up she'd become so accustomed to doing with men in the past. What was she afraid of here? Of getting hurt? No, she was afraid above all else that she'd actually fall for him.

I don't wanna hear the phone ring
Don't wanna hear your voice on the line
I don't wanna come to you, I don't wanna come to you
I don't wanna give in this time
Girl, I'm lovin' you, lovin' you against my will

He drew her in closer, pressing his cheek against hers swaying in time to the gentle twang of the music. The sweet summer scent of coconuts and mangoes, the one he was beginning to associate with her washed over him like a summer rainstorm. She was timeless and exquisite, but what if he couldn't do her justice? She deserved that and so much more. His hand clasped around hers tighter and pulled her in, the buckle of his belt pressing against her stomach.

Well your love is like a deep dark river
Pullin' me out to sea
The harder I try to resist you
The weaker I seem to be

Her nipples tightened and ached through the flimsy material of her dress as she imagined for a split second what they'd feel like scraping against the bed of fur she could just see poking at the top of the v in his shirt. She was fighting a battle she desperately was losing and the subtle way his hand splayed further across her back wasn't helping.

He seemed so gentle, loving and interested in her just for her with no ulterior motive that had plagued her so often in the past. How was this possible or was she being naive and he'd turn out the same as all the rest? She cursed inwardly drawn in by the scent of man and spice when her cheek found his shoulder, the soft fibres of the dinner jacket grazing her skin. She let her hand fall from his and slide around the back of his waist under his jacket along with her other. Too late now.

I don't wanna turn down your side street
I don't wanna pull in your drive
I don't wanna come to you, I don't wanna come to you
I don't wanna give in this time
Girl, I'm lovin' you, lovin' you against my will

Jon tucked his arms around her waist and closed his eyes resting his chin on her head. The attraction between them drew him in like a magnet but still he could feel the distance she was still fighting to put between them. He wouldn't push her, hell even he didn't know if he was ready for this. He'd been so selfish in his marriage and when he'd realized it, it was too late. He couldn't do that to her.

Lily wasn't like most women he met in his life. She wouldn't know the meaning of avarice or clingy, hell she was so self assured, so independent. God he just loved that in a woman. She was gorgeous too, but in that unaware way, she just didn't get that she was so beautiful. He was just a regular guy from Jersey, but after years in the business he appreciated that innocence.

Well your love is like a deep dark river
Pullin' me out to sea
The harder I try to resist you
The weaker I seem to be

His breath tickled her hair and the steady thump of his heartbeat drummed against her ear. The warmth of his body nestled so close to hers sent tingles down her spine. This simplistic intimacy that had been long been absent from Lily's life now stood with his arms wrapped around her. Her fist tightened fighting the internal battle she knew she was beginning to lose.

What could be the worst that could happen? She deserved this didn't she? Her heart jumped into her throat when his hands slid further down her back resting at the top of the curve of her ass. Oh god Oh god, the wall was fading and just one more move and she'd give in to him. She wanted to, god how much she wanted to but her stubborn streak was pulling her back.

I don't wanna feel your heartbeat
I don't wanna taste your kiss
I don't wanna call your name, I don't wanna call your name
I don't wanna want you like this
Girl, I'm lovin' you, lovin' you against my will
Lovin' you, lovin' you against my will

"Lily" Jon whispered, almost fighting for breath with her arms vicing so tightly around him.

She pulled away embarrassed but he stopped her "It's ok" he said, her blue eyes melting into his very soul, filled with a sadness he longed to take away. His hand reached out and brushed her cheek but this time held it there. Scraping the pad of his thumb along her cheek bone he inched closer looking for any signs to stop but they never came.

Her legs started to quiver underneath her at the touch of his other hand that cupped her cheek. Her heart was aching with the need for him to touch her, her soul screamed yes but her head screamed no. God, just one kiss couldn't hurt could it?

His blue eyes deadlocked on hers as he moved forward, the music and the courtyard suddenly fading away leaving her standing in front of the man just moments away from kissing her. Nothing else seemed to matter anymore.

The walls crumbled in her heart, and washed away when she closed her eyes waiting for it to come. The soft feel of his lips surprised her at first before she melted forward in to arms, his tongue teased the upper curve of her lip but didn't move causing her eyes to open. A slight smirk curved at the corners of his mouth, and she stifled a small groan feeling her nipples tighten even more.

"Jon…." came the only word she could manage.

He placed his finger against her lips "Shhhh" before pressing his to hers. Fire exploded in her blood igniting the one thing she ignored for so long, lust and desire for a man beyond the bedroom.

His tongue plunged into her mouth, tangled with hers they danced a dance of what could be to come if she let it. Her head was dizzy with the indescribable need to take him right there and then. Her hands lifted to his cheeks with the faint feel of stubble tickling her palms.

He tasted like sweet dark honey, the kind that left you craving for more. Finally they broke away, pressing his forehead against hers locked still in each other's embrace unable to move.

Her chest felt weak, the wind had been sucked right out of her lungs and if she moved suddenly she would be on the floor.
His hands smoothed down her arms and rubbed gently, his eyes still firmly locked to her pink swollen lips that had his groin aching for more of her. So many things he wanted to say to her, but aware that too much too soon was never a good thing. He remained silent just keeping the mood alive with light touches along her arms till his hands laced with hers.

"Dinner" he motioned back towards the restaurant but waited for her to take the cue keeping the moment as long as he could.

She nodded and he moved his feet to walk but she stopped him "Wait" she said. She lifted her hands to wind around his neck and arched her body into him. The fire had been lit, and she was afraid it would never go out "Thank you" she whispered tilting upwards to meet him in another kiss, this one softer than the first.

The smile reached his eyes "Your most very welcome Lily St James" he tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and kissed her on the nose. He clasped her hand in his and led her back into the restaurant keeping her close to him until they reached their table.

She slid back into her seat and picked the menu, her skin was hot and her face felt flushed. Pull yourself together, Jesus it was just a kiss. It's not like you haven't had one before. Not one of those kisses.

She tried to focus on the menu but her mind was still back out in the courtyard, the menu items were a blur in front of her. Here it comes, the St James debrief. What are you doing? He's going to expect you to go home with him now. Why was that so bad? She wanted to, come on. Her body careened every time he touched her, so just imagine what... stop it, don't go there. He wasn't asking for anything here, maybe she deserved to have some fun? What could possibly be bad about that?

**Gary Allan. Loving You Against My Will.